FAQ: Mediating a Parenting Plan Without Going to Court
Mediation Before Litigation
When parents are no longer together, figuring out how to build a parenting plan can feel overwhelming.
For many families, mediation offers a path that is calmer, faster, and far less expensive than traditional court processes — but it also raises a lot of questions.
Here are some of the most common questions I hear from parents who are considering mediation to create a parenting plan without going to court.
Can we really create a binding parenting plan without ever going to court?
Yes. In Texas, if both parents reach a properly executed Mediated Settlement Agreement (MSA), it becomes legally binding. As long as both parties follow the agreement, there’s no immediate need to go to court. If one parent later needs enforcement, the court can issue an order based on the MSA without having to renegotiate everything from scratch.
What exactly is a Mediated Settlement Agreement (MSA)?
An MSA is a written agreement made through mediation that outlines the terms of conservatorship, possession and access (visitation), child support, medical support, and any other important parenting issues. When it meets Texas legal requirements, it is binding on both parents.
Is an MSA the same as a court order?
Not exactly. An MSA is binding between the parents, but it is not a court order until a judge formally signs off. Until then, the MSA can’t be enforced through contempt of court proceedings. However, if someone stops following it, the other parent can file a case and is generally entitled to have a court order entered based on the MSA’s terms.
Isn’t court the normal way to handle parenting plans?
Actually, most cases that are filed in court are settled through mediation anyway. Very few family law cases end in a full trial. Courts encourage — and often require — parents to attempt mediation before final hearings. Starting with mediation simply means you’re choosing the solution that most families end up using, without adding the stress, time, and expense of litigation.
Why wouldn’t we just go to court now and make it official?
Some parents choose to immediately formalize their MSA into a court order, and there are good reasons to do so — it adds another layer of protection and full enforcement power. Others prefer to wait, especially if cooperation is strong. Filing for a court order isn’t required unless enforcement becomes necessary, but it can offer extra peace of mind.
What happens if one of us stops following the agreement?
If one parent stops following the MSA, the other parent can file a case with the court. Courts in Texas are generally required to approve properly executed MSAs unless there are very narrow reasons not to. Having the MSA in place makes it much easier to obtain a formal order if needed, without starting negotiations all over again.
Does mediation mean we have to meet at the same time?
No. Many mediations today — including the ones I offer — are asynchronous. That means each parent communicates separately with the mediator through private messages, phone calls, or video chats. It gives everyone more time to think, process, and work through the issues without the pressure of immediate confrontation.
Can we have a lawyer look at the agreement before signing?
Absolutely. Many parents choose to have an attorney review the draft MSA before signing. Limited-scope review is a great way to get professional input without turning the process into a full-blown legal battle. It’s a practical way to protect yourself while keeping the focus on cooperation.
What topics should our parenting plan cover?
Most plans cover conservatorship (decision-making rights and duties), possession and access (the schedule for parenting time), child support, medical support, communication guidelines, and sometimes geographic restrictions. Mediation allows you to tailor the plan to fit your family's specific needs, rather than forcing you into a one-size-fits-all template.
Is mediation only for people who get along perfectly?
Not at all. Mediation often works even when there’s tension, distrust, or difficult history. You don't have to agree on everything before starting. You simply have to be willing to work toward an agreement — one step at a time, with the child’s best interest at the center.
Mediation gives you options. It lets you stay in control of your child’s future instead of handing that control to a judge.
It isn’t always easy — but when approached thoughtfully, it can be one of the best investments you make in your family’s stability and peace.
If you’d like to learn more about how mediation could work for your situation, or if you’re ready to get started, feel free to reach out.
You don’t have to figure this out alone.